POSTED AT 01:26 AM

budzter

i. don't. wanna. go. to. school.

 

then again imma see that cutie at sci10 class so it might well be worth it. wheee.. here i go again.

POSTED AT 11:16 AM

budzter

6....

 

6 fucked up lbs.

 

SIX!!! that's how much i gained after 10+ days of pigging out.

 

 

could've been worst.

but still extremely bad.

 

it's back to starving for me. i just hope i have enough will power to lose all this... and more.. dba sannds??? we need to get into our beach bodies before the sem ends!!!! 

Feeling: depressed

POSTED AT 09:31 PM

budzter

dead tired. accounting is becoming a nuisance.

loving my ecomath classmate. *wink* @stace dba dba dba?? teehee

but still hating ecomath.

eco111 is extremely ugh. but at least i'm starting to get it. konting basa lang pala katapat niya eh.

sci10 is zzzzzz.. extremely. but i have a feeling i scored low on that LT.

psych is kewl. and easy. that's what makes it so nice. haha. and i don't mind my rowdy classmates too much nymore. besides, i'm meeting new people there... tnx frannn!!!

team's starting to get demanding, thanx to team captain pau balite. but it's all good. he's right. if i want medals, i gotta work! haha

working for lex - sam's project. went back and forth from osa to oas., dapat kasi those depts are next to each other eh, not 5 something buildings away. but it's all good - at least i'm losing some calories. and i'm learning stuff about handling projects too.

 

i need to make my life as productive as possible. bring it on! haha.. but i'm kinda sick right now so... yeah. haha.

i need to cut down on the smoking also. mum says i'm becoming a nicotine addict and that it's only gonna be a matter of time before i become cig dependent. i don't want that. besides. i reek - really turning into a chimney now. haha. so there, i'm buying per stick instead of by pack... down to at most 2 sticks per day? again, willpower!!! i hope i don't gain too much weight by this tho - mum gained exactly 30 pounds when she quit before...

 

sleeping habits are still messed up. have to work on that. and keeping my room clean too..

 

 

is this a list of new year's resolutions? hahah.

 

i have accounting lt's on monday. wish me and my friends luck folks!

 

i'm outtie. buhbye.

 

 

oh yeah, i scored a pathetic 80 sa accounting LT. but i'm in no position to complain. . .  f*ck paul cheng for scoring a 99 (peace bro, you know i love you BUT COULDN'T YOU HAVE SCORED like 3 POINTS LOWER PARA MAS MABABA YUNG CURVE??? so normal people like, well, ME can have a better grade?? not to mention those who need the curve to pass?!)

 

congratulations gen! .. and you were so scared of failing, too! then you scored higher than me! haha. and to everyone else who had decent scores, congratulations!!!

Feeling: inspired

POSTED AT 09:13 PM

budzter

one kwazy day. i stood in front of the mirror and gave myself .... bangs.

 

bigla lang akong nagising at naisip kong gusto kong may nahuhulog sa mukha ko. great.

 

they're disgusting really. and so not bagay sakin. but howell. they're there. i have to deal.

 

kwazy kwazy kwazy

POSTED AT 11:43 PM

budzter

i need a happy thought. my ibang level crush isn't working anymore.

 

i'm gonna fail that accounting exam. or maybe get a sabit D. i dint study as much as i should have. so there,. bobo move. bobo bobo move. boo. my bad. sorry self, once more  i let you down. but hey, i'm not blaming anyone (least of all paul) kung mag fail man ako. no one's fault but mine. no one else's. just. mine.

mine.

mine alone.

 

turns out the name stace gave me was wrong. ibang ****** pala yung sinasabi niya. grr. grr at JD. wrong info! haha

 

howell...

 

on a happier note.

 

..

wala. walang happier note. really depressed right now. i pigged out then chain smoked. now i'm gonna be off to dreamland.

 

 

oh. btw i'm missing someone who's just there. distant na kasi. and all this shit with school isn't helping. hayyy.. i wanna go back to last sem when i could spend time with my friends. harrumph.

 

as usual malabo pa rin akong tao. i need a hug. a huge bone crushing hug. seriously. that or a full body massage.

 

or a bottle of tequila. or an airplane. gags. lalong lumalabo toh ah.

hay. enough. i'm out.

POSTED AT 11:15 AM

budzter

kala ko sayang ang gising, bihis at pagpunta sa school ng maaga. pero dahil dun, nakumpleto araw ko.

 

i went to school for a group meeting. out of 6 or 7, only 2 went. grr. inconsiderate freaks.

 and then we agreed to meet nalang on ym tonight.

 

so there. i got up and got dressed, went to school for a meeting that lasted about 5 minutes.super badtrip noh?

 

 pero nung bumaba ako, nakita ko siya, haha.

 

haha.

 

haha.

 

hotness. whee. he likes bright colors - naka orange siya kanina. wehhh.

 

this day is complete. especially since i never see him mwf's. happy.

 

owkei, for the record, this is just a petty crush. not even. of course lamang pa rin si ibang level crush. but for now, ...

 

omg i don't make sense. i gots tuh get (some more) sleep.

Feeling: ecstatic

POSTED AT 08:15 PM

budzter

how much should you trust a person? what info are you allowed to disclose? how close do you have to be to a person for you to be able to trust him? 

 

kicking myself. i've said too much, i think. stupid hyper me, said too much again.

i saw him
POSTED AT 07:13 PM

budzter

i saw him.

I SAW HIM!

i saw HIM.

I saw him.

hehehehehehehee happpppyyyy.

kahit ilang ***** hindi magaamount to one ******.

altho i'd have to admit medyo nagtone down yung ibang level crush ko, malakas pa rin! na prove siya kanina. hahahha

 

POSTED AT 02:32 AM

budzter

happy hyper night with sannds and francine.... whhheeee lurve you guys! muwahzsh

gah.
POSTED AT 05:38 PM

budzter

got tipsy with some blockmates yesterday. ayun, di tuloy nakapag jog.

 

FAT ASSS... blah.

 

might go with stace later tho.

 

 

will get that bora body. promise.

 

 

i've been doing crunches along with the jogging. that plus starving myself = byebye fat pig!!!

 

but then i've been drinking lotsa fraps and cream+sugar filled coffee so WALA RIN. grrr. grr at self. but then again, i gots tuh stay awake while i study!

 

 

speaking of which, i group studied the other night with my blockmates at starbucks for ecomath. tapos yung test super dali lang. if everything went well, i think -5 lang ako dun (yung isang question na i dint bother to answer nymore kasi di ko talaga alam)...

 

looks like my angels are serving me well - pushing me to work harder. :*

POSTED AT 04:52 PM

budzter

words in my head between 1:30-3.

papasok ba ako?

papasok kaya siya?

sana pumasok siya.

malamang papasok siya.

cge pasok nalang ako.

... hellow ibang level crush. pero bahala ka muna sa buhay mo. one track mind ako ngayon.

o san na siya?

where ??

WHEREEEE???

putangina di siya pumasok

sayang. sana umuwi nako. ack.

@ibang level crush.
POSTED AT 09:11 PM

budzter

sana naman by now alam mong ikaw yun, dba? waha.

siyempre mas mabigat ka pa rin sa kanya.

 

but from here on, it's up to you. this is as far as i'll go.

POSTED AT 05:55 PM

budzter

i can and i will. seriously. i will. watch me.

 

 

ack. you know that ecomath long test? gah. i got a 65. sixty five (B) when i was expecting a 75 (A). i missed 2 sub questions - one was 5 points (yung hindi ko sinagutan) and the other, WAS CORRECT! the only thing wrong with it was that i kept the answer in the brackets instead of writing delta xsub1 is equal to blahblahblah while delta xsub2 is equal to blahblahblah. but dba pareho lang yun? don't i deserve even a little partial point? wacky. crazy i tell you. she's super lupit pala. gah.

what's worse? nagkamali siya mag record ng score ko! she put 10/80 instead of 65/80 - so my standing in the sheet she posted was a fucked up F. I SO DID NOT GET AN F! FUCKER! ugh. all the people from all her three classes are gonna look through that sheet, my crush included, and I HAVE A FUCKED UP F NEXT TO MY ID NUMBER. sure he prolly won't recognize it, but it's humiliating still. the thought of him going through that sheet and saying "whoa, may naka F. ang bobo naman nito. sino kaya si 0404**?" or something to that effect. UGH. and i'm being my old crazy self so.. yeah. AAAAAHHHHH... I DON'T GET F's!! I JUST DON'T! gah.

so there. my ecomath standing is a lowly B. a B. wahhh... i can and i will. i will get an A in the next long test. promise.

that or ... i dunno what.

 

 

in the arms of an Angel. fly away from here.

POSTED AT 01:48 AM

budzter

Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone,
Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone,
Silence the pianos and with muffled drum
Bring out the coffin, let the mourners come.

Let aeroplanes circle moaning overhead
Scribbling on the sky the message He Is Dead,
Put crepe bows round the white necks of the public doves,
Let the traffic policemen wear black cotton gloves.

He was my North, my South, my East and West,
My working week and my Sunday rest,
My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song;
I thought that love would last for ever: I was wrong.

The stars are not wanted now: put out every one;
Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun;
Pour away the ocean and sweep up the wood.
For nothing now can ever come to any good.

 

 

mr. angeles mentioned this poem in class.

it's by w.h. auden.

salamat kenny for sending it to me.

POSTED AT 02:09 PM

budzter

gah. i'm super pissed. i'm gonna say this again- i hate having to put up with people. but then when you don't have a choice.... ugh. gah. you wanna get mad but you just can't cause that's not an option. you wanna scream and you do but it doesn't help much. you need to hit someone but you know that that's not gonna work either. so what should you do? gahh.....

POSTED AT 11:23 PM

budzter

2 years ago i made this bet with my friends: by october 20 2006 we'd all have boyfriends. dapat kasi by the time we're all 19, no more NBSB. haha.

they were all so sure i'd win (i.e., get a boyface first, ahead of any of them) but looks like that's not gonna be happenin nytime soon. besides i'm not about to go for just anyone, just so i'd win that bet. i'm not like that.

 

 

ayown.

 

 

watched rumor has it with yen kanina. i super loved it. lines to remember:

"it's not that i can't live without you. i can, i just don't want to."

"she said she loved me. she said that whereas being with him was an adventure, she loved me and she felt she could make a life with me." or something like that.

and many more! watch it, sobrang nice. better yet, watch it on a date!

 

once more another date movie WITH YEN. tangina, sana gwapong lalake ka nalang para mas kewl. hahaha. peace yen!

 

 

hay. i have been sentenced to death. death by boredom that is. i have spent the day lounging around my room staring at my screen until it was too much to bear, that's why i called yen and we went off to gateway. then when i got home i got super pissed again (at the stupid curfew, what else? i should've been with my blockmates already! gah!) and i was smoking outside then i thought "what the fuck am i doing to myself?" so i got off the bench, got dressed and went for a jog,.. at 9:40 in the evening. why not? haha.

 

 

haruy. anyway, i picked this book up from the lib by the way, the decameron by giovanni boccaccio. i haven't gone past the first chapter but i have a feeling this is gonna be an extremely long, hard read. i hope it'd be worth it - mr. angeles described it as "literary porn" or something like that, and that got me curious. i mean who would think that writers from centuries ago would write about hard core sex - i thought those old european languages were supposed to be romantic (in that poetry blahblah sense) and not too graphic with extremely gory imagery. gah. anyway, we'll see how i like it. i might return it before i even get past the first 2 stories. haha.

 

 

so uhm. what else? that's about it, i think.

POSTED AT 12:46 AM

budzter

i blogged on jen's blog. i wrote a poem! well it doesn't look/sound like one, but since jen insists it is, then hala sige. hehehe here's the link if you wanna check it out. xp

 

www.tabulas.com/~jenjereren

 

xp

POSTED AT 01:59 PM

budzter

i'm gonna quote a friend's blog:

"Getting out of bed is no hard feat
It's getting things done thats the trick
Not much to look forward to today
But the possibility of seeing you... might give me the kick"*

 

wank. altho feeling ko magkaibang context, tsaka i'm not exactly sure where he's coming from, kuhang kuha lang in those lines exactly yun naffeel ko for ibang level crush for the longest time na...

 

anyhoo, ayown.

 

kaya fun mag read ng other people's blogs eh. at least by that you know that other people feel the same things you do. that you're not toooo pathetic kasi there are other people who share the same feelings.. (why not, naghahanap ng karamay. wahahaha)

 

 

*i got that from www.latebloomer1985.blogspot.com

POSTED AT 12:04 AM

budzter

Well, I'm a girl of many wishes
Hope my premonition misses
But what I really feel my eyes won't let me hide
?Cause they always start to cry
?Cause this time could mean goodbye

the original version's by stevie wonder. lately.

i'm learning how to sing this song right now. wala lang. pero hirap ng tono niya! gah. blech. but i love it. hehehe

lately i have had the strangest feeling/ with no vivid reason here to find/but the thought of losing you's been hanging/ from my mind.... dadadadidadada.. hahaha

falling out of love...
POSTED AT 05:23 PM

budzter

i think the title more or less gives it away. i'm falling out of love. with shooting, that is.

please do me a favor and shut up about whatever you see here.., after all, they are just thoughts.

 

 

i say i don't have the time. but i have a feeling i do. it's just that i DON'T WANT to have time for it. does that make sense?

but how can i possibly lose love for that which played a big part in keeping me sane throughout first year? (there were two - my team and my bestfriend. without them i'd have gone nuts.)  but now i can't seem to get myself to go. it's so weird.

that which once relieved me of stress now feels like such a chore to do.

 

 

what used to make me feel better, now only makes me feel real bad., for some reason. i don't understand. it's so weird. maybe because my shots have been real bad the past few times? but that has never stopped me...

 

 

i love my team. i love my coach. i love shooting.  but why the heck can't i get myself to go?

 

i know this has got nothing to do with what happened with.... or maybe it does. classical conditioning. ugh. could i have possibly associated this with that and that with this? (ack, obvious ba, hirap akong sabihin?/ayoko talagang sabihin?) or dahil ba medyo feeling ko cold towards me yung iba kong teammates? particularly ehemasdfehemedasdfehemehem.

posible din na i feel that i'm not any good at it, and that the only reason(s) why i'm still in the team is (are) (1) i was number 10. 10th out of 10. or (2)coach took pity on me and decided to keep me. i have a feeling that my position there is undeserved and that makes me feel bad.

 

 

i dunno. honestly. i don't.

 

 

i don't get why i can make time for school, my friends, lex, boredom, smoking, etc etc. and not make time for this? i thought i super loved this? ack.

 

 

i'm not saying i'm quitting or anything like that. i'm not making any rash decisions. after all this IS something i really love doing.  but i'm really confused.... haruy.

 

 

... and there's a competition next weekend. and it looks like i'm joining. and i'm so not ready for it. gah. uh oh.

 

 

 

kung teammate kita at binasa/binabasa mo toh, pdeng kausapin moko?

i need some guidance. or if you're not nice enough to give me some

at least just shut yer trap.

Feeling: depressed.

POSTED AT 06:58 PM

budzter

jen's line: "lungs filled with the cold midnight air"

yun na pala tawag dun ngayon? usok lang naman yun eh. wehehehheheheh

peace.

POSTED AT 09:58 PM

budzter

who went drinking on a school night?

who went to drew's instead of studying accounting?

who swore off smoking but smoked none the less?

 

i did i did!!!

so did ialou, charmie, chill and marco plus charmie's friends.

 

well except for the smoking bit.

 

 

gawd i feel so bad! but what the hey twas fun twas fun. muwazsh you guys.

POSTED AT 10:24 PM

budzter

why not. the standard i love you but you don't love me. i love you but you love someone else. i want you but you want someone else.

 

'stigers. kewlness.

 

story of my life. and everybody else's for that matter. one way or another. puro hurt cause of love.

 

it's pathetic. but for some reason it's easy for people to stomach that. na sad ka kasi may love problems blahblah. prolly cause everyone can relate.

 

this is turning out to be more trouble than it's worth.

you're turning out to be more trouble than you're worth.

 

 

hah. and i said i wouldn't even try anymore. who was i kidding?

 

ikaw pa rin. ikaw pa rin. kahit mas maraming kang dinudulot na sakit kesa saya. ikaw pa rin.

 

dito lang ako. antayin kita. dito lang sa tabi tabi.

 

 

powta. martyr ba ito? so not me. no not me.

 

blech.

 

bahala ka nga. powta.

POSTED AT 07:03 PM

budzter

nakakapagod mabuhay.

 

pero go pa rin.

 

 

mas nakakapagod mabuhay ng malungkot.

 

kaya dapat mawala lahat ng nagpapalungkot.

 

 

kung hindi moko mapasaya,,, pwede ba mawala ka nalang?

 

 

 

hhehehehehehhe

POSTED AT 07:50 PM

budzter

mahirap mauna. promise. lalo na pag ganito.

 

kaya dapat sabayan moko.

 

sabayan moko.

POSTED AT 01:00 AM

budzter

mn. watched cheaper by the dozen 2 with sannds to get out of senti mode.

bad idea. twas another dad movie. shit. i hate dad movies.

 

 

howell...

 

 

had a busy day kanina,.. well sort of.

 

i got up at 12 then hung lang. i cut sci10 again out of laziness and then went to school at around 2:30 for my psych class. went to mateo ricci and hung with jethro and some other people i dunno then cut my eco111 class to setup for the lex talk. twas okei, except for the part where i had to run back and forth between som211 and escaler to get that frikkin cable. then after setting up i had to run to the range for the team meeting and then hung out konti then went back to som211, handed out some survey sheets from faster (the sponsor) and then after that went back to the range, talked to some people, finalized some plans for the weekend, then paid 20 fucked up pesos for the trike ride home. but then it was that or walk home in the dark in the rain,. so 20 pesos it is. then went on ym, chatted with some peeps then went off to eastwood.

 

hayy. busy day (sort of) noh? hehe

 

ran into:

1. the guy i like(d) who has a gurlfriend already. he's such a frickin flirt, damnit.

2. the ass hole i'm trying not to talk to nymore. who keeps on making epal in my conversations with my friends.

3. my new ym/blog friend.

4. .... wala na. yun na yun na 3.

 

 

anyway. being in senti mode sucks. totally. gah. if you wanna read my senti eklat go to my other blog www.vanillawithchocolate.blogspot.com

 

comments and suggestions are very much welcome. hehe.

 

 

i love you sannds!!! you're one of the bestest pals a person could've. gimic on saturday? *hugz*

POSTED AT 09:04 PM

budzter

kelan pa? powtanginang shyet.

kelan pa mauubos itong kalokohang toh?

lagi nalang senti mode. sawa na ako sa senti mode.

sa inuman, senti mode. sa yosi break, senti mode. sa blog senti mode. sa ym senti mode pa rin.

 

pOwtanginang shyet talaga!!!gah...

 

 

anyhoo. went drinking with the block again. twice in a week on 2 schoolnights too. gen ('inay') is so gonna give me a scolding. hahaha. peace gen.

 

anyway, tomorrow, party with my team. then saturday might go to that eden thing at rockwell tent (i wanna wanna wanna!!!) then sunday. wala. i might as well just back out of that competition. gahhh. >

 

ayown.

 

again. i need a huge tremendous bone crushing hug. please? pleaSE?

 

hehehe.

 

 

*nagsasawa nako. lagi nalang ako ang kailangan mag hanap ng paraan. akala ko ba no yun sagot ko dun sa question ng teammates ko? tangina. is this me? i thought this was supposed to be low? why am i doing this? gahg. gaaahg talaga. nakakainis., nakakaasar., bakit kailangan ako yun unang gumalaw?

POSTED AT 09:46 PM

budzter

by the way, i woke up at 10. i missed two classes - pe and accounting. overcut na ata ako sa pe. gah. ohwel.,

POSTED AT 11:41 AM

budzter

i'm happy again. i think.

 

i'll be getting back to my old usual self with all the angst and all the kalokohan and panglalait and whatnots.

 

thank you for bearing with my senti mode.

 

bye bye sadness and sorrow.

 

hellow joy and bliss...

 

 

hahahahhaha....

 

 

 

 

let's go jogging? anyone? game? woohoo!

POSTED AT 11:40 AM

budzter

well i had an extremely bad/good/weird night last night.

 

pau's "surprise party" was suuper kewl. we drank we smoked we listened to kenny king and apags sing, we ate, we laughed, we popped balloons with our bare hands... woo hoo!

 

the original plan was that ed brings me home cause it was only logical - he does live a few blocks away lang. but then he left a bit early and i was still kinda having fun so i asked EZ to bring me instead. he's from xavierville din lang pala so twas okay with him.

 

at like 12:30 ez said we should leave na so i could make the 1 am curfew tapos when we got to his car, i had a surge of topak, i asked if i could drive. his car was manual, but i thought kaya. i should've realized that the transmission of a gasoline engine na kotse is way different from that of a diesel pajero. gah. namatay yung engine. ayaw na mag start. i was like holy camote. shit shit. the terrain kasi of tierra pura isn't smooth so andami paakyat and baba eh i kinda have trouble with that. so inayos na.. we were able to leave. we got to katip at like 1:15. 15 minutes late sa curfew. and knowing manong, hindi na niya ako papapasukin.

 

so there i was. locked out of my "housE" at 1:15 in the morning. what did i do?

 

i called sannds. thankyou sobra you really saved my ass back there. muwazsh. then we went eastwood. had coffee. walked around. walked around some more. then went mcdo katipunan, ate and hung out.. then at like 4:30 we decided to tambay sa gesu. so we just sat there for like an hour and a half singing and waiting for the sunrise which kinda took forever so we decided to leave nalang.

 

hayyy.. pagod.

i drank a lot i smoked a lot i got stuck outside the dorm, i sang in front of gesu.... haruyy. weird indeed.

 

sige, thatzit for now. m outtie..

POSTED AT 07:32 PM

budzter

tulala at tanga nde mkapagsalita... yeap i'm in lurve. hahahaha

 

i li'l help here please.

 

i can't seem to make much sense when i talk to him. hahaha

 

grreat noh?

 

parang better nung nagccrush lang ako from afar, kasi parang hindi talaga siya maabot, tsaka hindi ako nagmumukhang tanga. kaso andyan na eh hindi pa rin. online pa siya. hindi pa rin. naguusap na kami, wala naman akong masabi. kewlness.

 

 

but this isn't enough to get me into senti mode. i'm happy. happy happy happy happy., tsaka at least now i'm sure he knows i exist. i should be content with that already. i should. yeap. i should.

 

tangna mo ibang level crush. ang gwapo mo pa rin. hahahahahah

 

toink toink.

 

 

POSTED AT 07:40 PM

budzter

diane Blanco: besides we agreed on the "cuteness" of alot of guys..
gen espinosa: except, mr. acne infestation
diane Blanco: hehehehe
diane Blanco: acne infestation is hot in that mysterious sense
gen espinosa: ewww...
diane Blanco: i wanna dig him up (no sexual connotations please)
gen espinosa: ewww uli
diane Blanco: i have this weird feeling that there's more to him than that maangas, bobo face
diane Blanco:

 

 

between me and gen. hahahaha. i am so freakin weird.

POSTED AT 06:27 PM

budzter

i came across my old blog today. my freshman blog, the one on LJ. gawd was i cheesy or what? and for the wrong person too. i can't even stomach the thought of being crazy over him. hahah. my 16 year old self talaga o, crazy.

 

but that was more than a year ago already, so i'm a new, better person. still crazy over someone.

 

but then hopefuly i would laugh about what i'm going through now the way i laugh now about what i went through before.

 

 

 

i still need that humungus bone crushing hug. the type that would leave your body bruised. now why would i want that? beats me, i just do.

POSTED AT 01:01 PM

budzter

i'm the big blind and you're the dealer in this card game of love. 

 

 i have my cards face down on the table; i'm betting without knowing what i've got or what i'm up against.

 

i dunno what cards you would deal. but i'm no wuss, folding is not an option.

 

i'm gonna go through this like every other person. i'm gonna risk it and i'll see what happens.

 

 

 

hoy hindi ko sinasabing ako ang manliligaw ah. bleh.

POSTED AT 08:49 PM

budzter

what the fuck.

so that's why they're being nice-y nice all of a sudden. mga pakshit. ano ako? baunan ng problema? putanginang shit kayo? isang napakalaking tengang tagapakinig?

 

akala ko ba we've settled this once and for all? akala ko ba we don't talk about this anymore after that incident right after new year? akala ko ba tapos na toh? akala ko ba you'd stay out of each other's noses and just live. pakshit. tapos dadamayin nyoko.

 

and you wonder kung bat nagkakaganun si kuya? duh! duh!!!! tingnan nyo naman kung ano pinaggagagawa nyo! after all those promises and shit, you're gonna shock us all with news like this? you guys, it's not gonna frikkin work okay? so just shut the fuck up and steer away from THAT.

 

i hate my parents. i super super hate them talaga. inconsiderate freaks. who are you to ask me if i'm okay? should i be okay after all this shit? putangina niyo!!!

 

you're just lucky my bros and i are smart enough to NOT let this ruin our lives cause if we were any dumber, we'd prolly get so frustrated with the two of you we'd have jumped off san juanico like years ago.

i hate you i hate you i hate you.

 

 

 

whew. glad that's out. i just wanna scream.

i wanna scream cause i dun wanna cry.

aaaaaaaarrrrrggghhh....

 

payosi na nga lang. gah.

 

 

 

and life has a funny way of sneaking up on you when you think everything's alright. indeed. indeed. assss...

 

from now on all phone calls from either of them are to be rejected.

Feeling: angggrrryyyy

POSTED AT 05:38 PM

budzter

pardon the previous angst entry. i'm okei now. ;p

 

 other news naman.

 

he's happy without me. i'm kidding myself if i say he's not. he won't be lonely without me,. i think he'd be pretty okay.

 

"don't you want to make that arrangement a li'l less impersonal?"

yes. definitely. but how can i when he won't even look at me... even when i try to catch his eye.

 

who am i to feel special? i'm going/i've been crazy about him for the longest time and he remains in oblivion. i might as well just stop liking him.. (as if that's so easy to do.) he now brings about more pain than happiness. the sight of him(avoiding me) only makes me feel worse than i already do.

maybe he's really just a nice person and he thinks i'm overly pathetic that's why he talks to me but then he doesn't really care. ahy nako. like i always say, nothing beats the pains of unrequited love (or in this case, like? hehe)...

hayy... but hey.. be glad he knows you exist, hunny. just be content with that already.

 

***

 

ayun,. my accounting score is a loser-ish 62.5/100. aasa nalang ako sa curve. hopefully,since the highest is 86, pde pa maging C+ something yan.

cross your fingers folks.